I’m avoiding tons of stuff today. Which generally means I’m watching tv (Psych…because I love Gus and Shawn) and scrolling through Facebook and Instagram.
For some reason I have come across several different different posts, written by totally different non-related people, talking about why they have recently left a profession they love – teaching. And while I am NOT leaving teaching – I find myself relating to most of not ALL of the reasons they are leaving. So why am I not leaving too?
I’ve decided (since I’m avoiding stuff today anyway) to take the 10 things I’ve read….and relate to…and give my take on them and maybe see if I can explain why it is that I’m NOT leaving.
#1 – Class Size – At my school 22 kids is the starting point. Every year at least half, if not more, classes get pushed beyond that. The district tells us we must accept every child. I do understand that I work in a public school and part of that is that we accept all kids. What I don’t understand is how overfilling our classes will help anyone meet the goals of the year. So most years I have about 24 kids in a classroom built in the 1920s intended for more like 18 kids. We trip over each other. I struggle to move around the room to get to everyone. Sitting on the floor together is more like playing a game of sardines. And yet, every year I look at 24 little 7 year old faces and there’s not a single one I can say, “Send that one away.” Yes, there are kids who test me more than others, but honestly when it comes right down to it, I know that Jesus loves each one of them as much as he loves my own precious girls. Knowing that makes it impossible to wish them away. Is having too many kids in a too small classroom easy? Not at all, but it’s not enough to make me leave teaching.
#2 – Respect – There are a couple of things to say here. First, I will say that I DO feel respected by the administration at my school. I also know that that is not the case at all schools. It breaks my heart to hear other teachers talk about how they are frequently disrespected by their administrators. I regularly have experiences where I am supported by and listened to by the admins on my campus. I do not take that for granted. Second, I feel like the parents at my school are split. There are some parents who I feel have a deep respect for what we do all day. There are also parents who treat us as if we are hired help…more in that later. Ultimately the reason I am not leaving teaching is because it doesn’t matter in the end. It makes life easier and more enjoyable, but I don’t need to feel respected by everyone. My value and self worth doesn’t come from what others think of me or my profession. I believe God put me here because it’s where He wanted me to be and because He has something for me to do here. Who am I to second guess that?
#3 – Testing – Now, I teach 2nd grade so we aren’t subject to all the horrific STAAR testing in my grade. That doesn’t mean I don’t have thoughts on it. 🙂 I have 2 daughters (and one who was in private school so she never had to take them) who have had to go through all this ridiculousness of STAAR. I have watched my colleagues prep their older classes for these tests. I have also administered tests to other classes and small groups. These tests stress kids and teachers. They base way too much on tests that are not reliable. There are too many things that can make or break a kid’s score. Did they sleep well last night? Did they get a good breakfast? Did they have a fight with Mom it Dad this morning? Are they in the middle of a breakup (middle school and high school, obviously)? Do they have test anxiety? What about the kids who are below grade level but have shown a ton of growth this year? I agree we need to have some accountability in place. I just don’t believe that it needs to be these tests. Tests that are written well above the grade level they are testing. Tests that carry entirely too much weight for the teacher and the students. Tests that ultimately are about money. But like I said, I don’t have to give the STAAR test. I still have tests I have to give. Tests that come from the district that are written in a way to confuse most of the time. Tests that have questions that we often have to work together as adults to figure out what they want. Tests. Bleh!!! So why don’t these tests send me running for the hills? Well quite honestly I decided a that I was going to teach the best that I could and my kids would learn as much as they could. If I did that and my test scores weren’t what they needed to be, I’d be ok. I will not be defined, nor will my students, by a single test or set of tests. My kids are creative. They are kind. They are curious. They are artists. They are dancers and musicians. I don’t worry about the tests…I’m not perfect, I do sometimes worry, but my intention is to set that aside and let my kids be the kids they are. I will not let inaccurate tests push me out of teaching.
Ok this has gotten way longer than I thought. I’m going to stop here for now and come back to some of the other issues (4 – it’s overwhelming, 5 – pay, 6 – kids have changed, 7 – technology vs relationships, 8 – useless trainings, 9 – customer service mindset, 10 -mental and physical health) another day.
Here’s what I’m sure of…I constantly have to recalculate my attitude and thoughts in order to be the person I want to be. I am not perfect at it, thank goodness I have the opportunities to reflect and recalculate!
As always, I’m interested in your thoughts and comments.
recalculating 